Re: A little help please

I know nothing about Ohio law but since most divorce laws are the same, I’ll take a shot. First, DOCUMENT everything (I always say this but it is critical.) Document the time you spend with your kids, the time SHE spends, when she drops them off, when she calls – everything.

Next, take your kids to see a therapist. Since they are young, take them to see one who specializes in children’s art therapy. Kids the age of yours love to draw and usually use it as an emotional outlet. You meet with the therapist first and tell him your fears and then let him/her do what she can to draw out whatever may be true for the kids. No only will you get some good evidence but you will also position yourself as a concerned dad (always helpful).

A father getting young daughters is VERY HARD. But the courts seem to be waking up. Just gather all the evidence you can. Remember, anti-family court is still a court which means the rules of evidence still apply. The only things that count are things you can prove.

Good luck.

A little help please

I have been divorced in Ohio for approximately 1 year. Can anyone (familiar with Ohio laws) what my odds are for getting custody of my two daughter (4 & 6)? They constantly cry when I take them back to her house, wanting to stay with me. It is killing me.
Here is a little back ground on my past with my ex-wife:

1. I was forced to take her to court and have an order placed stating that her step-father (who molested her as a child) could not baby-sit, be alone with our children, and they couldn’t spend the night at her mother and step-fathers house. I had to take her to court for this.

2. She is now 5 months pregnant with her current boyfriends baby.

3. I also get 6 weeks visitation instead of the standard 4 weeks. I get the first 3 weeks of the summer, she the second, and so on. I had my first three weeks (it was great, we went camping in Va., S.C., Tenn., and Ky.).

I dropped the girls off on a Sunday. On the following Thursday, she dropped them back off to me so her boyfriend and her self could go to Denver on vacation. She picked them up the following Wednesday.

I again had my three weeks (by the way, she only called twice to talk to the girls the whole 6-weeks I had them). Now I dropped the girls off on a Thursday evening and that Friday I was to have my standard visitation, she said I was not to see the girls for the next 3-weeks because this is her time with the girls. She then missed my weekday afternoon visit(but I called that evening to talk to them) and just yesterday missed my next weekend visitation. So I haven’t see my girls since the first of August. I have filed police reports each time she wouldn’t let me have my daughters.

If anyone can give me some advice on getting custody or anything other rights I might have, I would greatly appreciate it.

P.S. Check out the Photos. I am posting a editorial I just had printed in the Mansfield (Ohio) New Journal about fathers.

It is interesting to note

It is interesting to note that West Virginia was the first state to mandate “assumed joint custody” unless a parent could be proven in a court of law as unfit. The result has been a 20% drop in the state’s divorce rate. If I still have the article I’ll post it here but the reporter’s conclusion was that since women in W.Va can longer count on an easy “gravy train” that are not so quick to file for divorce.

Also, Great Britain has rejected no-fault divorce as too destructive to families and children. Interesting.

You may have to pay back welfare

You may have to pay back welfare, regardless of whether she defrauded them or not. It is very rare that they will prosecute a mother for fraud when they can go after the father.

There is a case in Modesto where a father has always had custody, for 16 years. The mother kept filing for welfare/AFDC and getting it. But, rather than prosecute her, they went after him. He currently owes over $25,000.

And if he smart he will make sure he doesn’t pay a dime and forces the government to declare fraud on the mother.

Will this happen – no because:

1) the false belief fathers are paychecks and

2) no one wants to rock the boat or the gravy train.

Going to court soon

Back in February, my ex wife decided to move to New Mexico with her boyfriend leaving my 9 year old daughter with me. I promptly filed for custody. Since then my daughter has beed therapy because her mother constantly makes her feel bad when she calls he. Plus she has venomous creatures at her new home NM. My daughter refuses to fly to NM alone and her mother wont come here.

Her mother countered my claim saying a lot of lies that I can easily prove otherwise. My ex wife also committed fraud with welfare to receive benefits, I reported her because she claimed at the time I had nothing to do with my daughter.

We are slated to go to court at the end of this month. Do you all think I have a good chance winning ?

I am asking this because I am a father wanting custody of my daughter.

Any input or suggestions…

Perjury By Ex Wife

My ex wife lied to the judge in order to get higher child support from me. Our daughter was living with her grandparents and my ex told the judge this morning that she was back with her as of last night.

I called the Dept. of children’s services and they said it’s not true. She will be going back next week. How can can I bring perjury charges against her. What forms do I use? Also, can I get the CS lowered?

Any help would be appreciated.

If your question is

If your question is “do I have a good chance of winning custody” I think the answer is “yes”. I’d say you have a very good chance. To strengthen your case, youmight want to do the following:

formally accuse your ex of abandonment. Many men loose out when the wife demands a divorce and they move out of the family home. Then the ex accuses them of abandonment and the father is toast. Do the same thing here – file papers accusing her of abandoning your daughter.

make sure your daughter WANTS to live with you. I’m sure she does, but have her ready to tell the judge that.

File “Innocent Spouse” forms with the IRS. This MAY save you from being prosecuted over the ex’s fraud.

Get proof of the dangerous critters in NM. Otherwise, the judge may force you to fly your daughter there against your and her wishes.

These lies you mention – again, get PROOF. HARD PHYSICAL EVIDENCE! Judges like that stuff and won’t give you any credit without it. Don’t demand that she prove what she is saying — you have to prove she’s lying.

See if the therapist will support you either in person or with a NOTARIZED letter. My son’s therapist supported us when we went for custody and it helped a lot.

Get enough money. You’ll need it to pay your attorney. I always use sites like Elcloans to apply for loans online – it saves a lot of time and efforts!

Be prepared with a WRITTEN parenting plan. How will you raise her alone? What changes can you/will you/have you made in your life and work to make sure she is cared for? What about interaction with the ex’s parents? And include all the potentially embarassing stuff like what will you do when she has her first period?? (Thank god I’m raising a son!!!)

Silly stuff – make sure (MAKE SURE!!!!) you know the names addresses and phone numbers of her teachers, best friends, doctor, dentist. it floors judges when ANY father knows this stuff and shows you are interested and committed.

If I think of anything else, I’ll let you know. I think absolutely you’ll win but always BE PREPARED!! Good luck


First I apologize for vanishing the way I did. I was laid off ten weeks ago and have focused all my energy on finding a new job.

It looks like I may get two offers in the next few weeks. The bad news is that both jobs are in Mass. and I live in PA. I am a custodial father and I know my ex will fight this with everything she has. Anyone have any advice on how to fight back?

For the record, the custody orders do not give her ANY court ordered visitation rights. The only ones she has are the ones I confer on her and I’ve been real easy with it. I can fill in the details if anyone needs them but the issue is how do I fight back against her efforts to keep me from moving?

Each time we have been in court

Her attorney has indicated 2 children. Never once giving the fact that I now have custody of my daughter. I have tried several time to provide proof through statements and evidence (all pertinent documents), and the courts will not recognize it.

On one such occasions I had a Hearing officer tell me to “shut up and go hire an attorney”, when I tried to provide documents and answer a question that she asked pertaining to the custody situation.

I don’t mean to sound bias, but her attorney (women) has gotten each and every hearing before another women. She began doing this after one hearing before a man, who became visibly upset with her and reprimanded her.

Re: Need Help

Since you went pro-se before I am assuming you are familiar with the Florida Family Laws, but just in case here is the link where it can be found online.

I have found knowledge to be my best weapon in court, make the child support guide lines and laws your bible if you have to! I would like to know how she is proposing that you owe for BOTH children when you have had one of them.

Make sure you have documented proof the child has been with you. School and medical records, pictures of her in your house and of her room. Statements from friends and family ect. This is pure idiocy on the part of the court! Best of luck to you.